Moderates recognize that Adoption will always be around.

I love moderates. Really. However, moderation is best even in moderation. Sometimes you have to be extreme. Adoption affects us in ways we can't always describe and helping others can be a burden, but it can also be a way to grow and to find our own voice. One thing is for sure, helping out is worth the effort. This is true especially in preventing adoption trauma for others. That is a really great way to heal from our own adoption trauma. (go to a big list of Adoption Trauma info to learn more about that idea)

Maybe you weren't traumatized by adoption. Good for you! You may have more to give as a result of not being damaged. But, then again, maybe getting involved will wake you up from the fog of denial and you'll find buried issues. That's ok too because bringing out dead issues and giving them a life of their own outside of your inner closet releases them from you and gives you a lighter better life. Either way, getting involved to help others is always a positive action. 

Most adoption reform organizations are run entirely by volunteers. It can be an extreme self sacrifice to volunteer for an all volunteer run non-profit. But it is worth it. I recommend getting involved because I have met all kinds of wonderful people volunteering for AAC and CUB. I don't just think I'm better off for this work. I know it. I also hear PACER and The Adoptee Rights Coalition are great groups too.

There is always an abundance of ways to help good adoption groups. Do you feel you have a mission to change the laws in your state or perhaps run a support group? Or maybe helping at an annual retreat or conference. Well, step up! Get involved. Donate. Give your time. Be an extreme moderate in reasonable doses. 

Get Active Moderates

This picture is me wearing a Day of the Dead hat and holding a big community made Adoption Mandala in front of a giant banjo that says "This machine surrounds hate and forces it to surrender." I'm generally not a fan of forcing anything, but why not be more powerful than hate? The Missoula, MT weather that night was so wonderful and moderate compared to other years. Along the way, when people asked and sometimes even when they didn't, I told folks, "This is for those who died without being able to know the family they lost due to adoption laws." News coverage of the event actually has our CUB made Mandala in the Parade! Too bad the link broke and I can't find the video anymore. dang it!

Try this for Grade School
(K-12) Students:

Alternate Family Tree Project

It's Adoption Friendly!


Use your printer and your favorite 8.5 x 11 paper

Or Copy the files and use them at your favorite copy shop to make bigger poster size versions.

Four 4 inch Mandalas


One 8 inch Mandala


Or email me and I'll give you directions for making really really big ones. Also, you can take these files and get wild with a fun program like photoshop or (which is different from Paint).


Print it.

Color it in.

And make it your own.

Then share  it!


This site is a work of heart
and a work in progress.
Come back for more soon!